Wednesday, May 12, 2010

How to be a Father (written from a female perspective;)

What does it take to be a father, dad, pops...daddy, whatever you choose to call yours? My daughter has always called Den Daddy or Dad. I capitalize to show the importance of the person.....he has been there to guide her, shape her, hold her, laugh and cry with her. He has sat in a hospital as she lay recovering from surgery and prayed for her as we've struggled with her issues.

I know that even if Den and I were to not make it as a couple, he would always provide for McKenna. She would be his first priority, as it should be. That thought comforts me. The knowledge that Kenna and Dad have a pretty good relationship makes me very happy. They have some things in common that Mom just doesn't get (or doesn't want to!) Phineas & Ferb. Yea, great...glad you guys enjoy it.

Dennis is her protector...the other half of the Parental Guiding Unit. She has such a bond with him that has been forged and shaped as if making a sword of strength. They will sustain this bond for life!

Dennis and I decided to change our entire lives when Kenna was three. Dennis was always on the road, traveling for work and we spent many nights saying "night night" on the phone.....way too many really. Dennis was tired of missing all the big milestones in her life, so we sat down and decided to sell everything we owned and move to Arizona to start over. Den came down first and began looking for a job which would keep him home and at home each and every night. He made sacrifices.

Dennis is a Father. Dennis is a Daddy. Dennis is there for our daughter on a continual basis. She is blessed because of this. She will probably have better relationships with men than girls from broken homes, and she will always have special times with Dad.

My niece Chelsie is graduating from ASU's Honor College this week. She will be a part of three different graduations, one for Honors, one for the entire class of ASU students and one for her college of Criminal Justice. She is also receiving a special award for those students who have had perfect gpa's for each semester they've attended. Pretty special right?

Her Mom is going to be at every graduation...and the open house. Her mom is going to be standing proud and smiling at the shining accomplishments of HER daughter. Chelsie's Father will be there as well....only it won't be her biological will be my Dad. Her Grand Father. Her Bumpa. The special man in her life.

Bumpa deserves the position. He has guided and worried over her, he's "had her back" throughout her entire existence. He has provided monetarily, spiritually and physically for her. He has always offered her advice, help and been proud of her accomplishments.

This blog is entitled How to be a Father. For some men this is an easy formula. There is one basic rule for being a Father....and that is to BE THERE FOR YOUR KIDS. Be there. Whether you have to drive across town or drive/fly across the nation. You have to BE THERE and put in the time..........or you are just a sperm donor.

The Father is the one who laughed and cried and worried and carried and sat with and read stories to and put to bed and drove home from school and taught to drive THERE. NO MATTER WHAT!

If you aren't being there for your kids, what does that say about you? Is there something more important in your life?

Wednesday, May 5, 2010

Voluptuous not consumable on prime time? Fox and ABC say NO!

I'm a very curvy woman. I shop at stores which cater to women with lots of curves. I eat, dammit! Okay, I'm eating less these days but even when I am the size I want to get to: I'll still be considered a Plus Sized Woman.

My husband actually told me about this story and I can't believe I hadn't heard about it yet. Apparently, ABC and Fox decided that a Lane Bryant ad was too risque for them to air. Why? You ask? Because they DARED put women in their bras and panties on the commercial. Now, doesn't this happen often with Victoria's Secret? Ah, never! Do they show lots of Little bras and teenie little panties during their annual fashion show? You betcha!

What is the difference? You tell me.....because I'm really sick of being a second class citizen. What gives anyone the right to say that the beautiful model from the Lane Bryant ad is any less of a person of beauty than the women modeling for Vicky's?

Discrimination is running rampant in many parts of the country right now based on Ethnicity but nobody ever talks about the discrimination that fat people go through every day of their lives. In fact, except for in very few places, it's quite legal to discriminate based on weight. Yup. Legal.

I will NOT fly Southwest Airlines due to their "buy two seats" mentality. Is it fair? If I buy three seats for myself, my daughter and my husband, even though we fit across the three seats well, they say my daughter is entitled to her own whole seat...and they would make both myself and my husband buy second seats. Your money may be refunded if the plane isn't full............right.

My problem with this is that it IS an unfair regulation. Does a person who is six feet, five inches and knocks the back of my seat the whole flight have to buy the seat in front of him? No. I've never heard of that happening. Does the person who talks to you annoyingly during the entire flight have to buy the seat next to them so you don't have to listen to their inane chatter? Nope. Never heard of that. Does the screaming baby get a second or third seat to accommodate all the screaming. HA! They don't usually even have to have a ticket for that child.

So, why does the fat person get the discrimination? Because our society lets them get away with it. Society allows fat people to be ridiculed by comedians, discriminated against by employers, and basically left to fend for ourselves.

I'm here, I'm fat. Get used to it!

Sunday, May 2, 2010

It's a Sunday kind of thing....

Looks like Sunday is my day to post! I'll try to get better about going so long between posts. This past week has been full of ups and downs for me. Mentally, physically and every other -ly! I went to my yearly women's physical a while ago and had what my Doc called a "funky" in office little EKG. So she made me wear a Holter monitor for 24 hrs. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be but I guess it has kind of scared me to think there's something up with my heart. Sometimes I over think things and sometimes I just don't think about things that are really bothering me so I think I've been doing a little of both on this subject!

This same week, McKenna had her 24 hr. EEG monitor. Hers was MUCH more intrusive and bulky so we basically came home with her get up on and hung out together the whole time. She did really well and I was so proud! We rewarded ourselves (though I am trying super hard never to reward with food ;) by going to Joe's Farm Grill in Gilbert. It is a heavenly place near her Docs and has been on Diners, Drive Ins and Dives. Worth the trip to anyone near Phoenix! Their food is very organic, they have their own Agritopia Farm for all the produce and they purchase free range chicken and really awesome grass fed beef. It's still a burger joint, but with a twist!

I have fallen for their Grilled Chicken with...oh, I'm gonna go steal their description. BRB.

"Pesto Chicken Sandwich" Fresh thyme-marinated Chicken, Swiss, roasted red bell pepper, grilled mushrooms, farm-made Pecan Pesto. Now their site says Swiss...but it is actually Fontina and it is huge and heavenly! Their fries are made fresh as well. Oh, just go look at their page and then plan to visit! I may start reviewing lovely dining places around here as well!

So I've been slowly trying to eat healthier and lose some weight. I have to get better about exercise though. The Wii is good but I will be honest and say I don't get it going enough. I've got a goal and I'll let you know if I EVER make it! I count dress size instead of weight. Easier for me. I've gone down four sizes since last year. I want to lose slowly so that is good I think. I've done it just by changing eating patterns.

I will probably lose faster now that I gave up my addiction to Pepsi! Pepsi is my crack and I mean that! I was addicted to soft drinks...but I have been soda pop/carbonation free since I returned from California. Let's see...that's 42 days "sober"! I plan to stay that way.

I won't even address my philosophical opinions on the week at this point. I just got my baby back from Nana and need to snuggle.....more later. Maybe!