Hello Again Long Lost Friend (California!)

I am back after a few month's absence! I love this area so much that I really wish I had unlimited income so I could be here all the time. Well, so the entire family could afford to be here all the time! Except when they wanted to visit somewhere else....which I guess could happen. No, I really can't!

We are staying in a lovely, lovely place here in Mission Viejo. I will include the link to the Hotel. I shall return here again and again if it stays this nice!

http://www.ayreshotels.com/missionviejo_spa/

They are all suite rooms with wonderful amenities. Check out the photo tour on the site. Den is sleeping and not feeling very well, but the other two of us shall venture out soon to view fireworks from the lawn of the hotel! It's a non-balmy 75 degrees high here today. Probably much cooler by now. We walked out of Chili's after our "linner" @ 3 ish and Kenna says: "It's like room temperature out here. Same as inside! I love it and I'm never gonna leave!" Considering it's a 40 degree drop from home, I agree!

Antsy girl is ready to go find some fireworks.....so we shall leave soon to see if we can see them. It's been a few years since I've actually seen them live as I have zero desire to sweat like a piggie while viewing them!

We were going to check out Balboa tomorrow but a friend told me that there are really huge waves hitting through Tuesday so we may re-evaluate our itinerary. We are going to go buy Kathy Griffin's book and stand in line to meet her Tuesday evening in Huntington Beach! Kenna and I love to watch her show! Her Mom Maggie will be there with her book as well. What fun!

Hopefully, we'll have pictures. Well I'm gonna get the camera out and see about these fireworks. More later, friends. Good to be back on here posting!

Oh, and it wouldn't be a 4th of July tribute without mentioning my Aunt Helen. May you and Uncle Ron and Stevie, and Steve and G&G Martin and Johnnie Otto and Patty and ALL the rest of you whom I love on the other side have a rockin' day! I know that you are making everyone wait a half hour after eating to swim and there's enough food for an army! Love you all!

How to be a Father (written from a female perspective;)

What does it take to be a father, dad, pops...daddy, whatever you choose to call yours? My daughter has always called Den Daddy or Dad. I capitalize to show the importance of the person.....he has been there to guide her, shape her, hold her, laugh and cry with her. He has sat in a hospital as she lay recovering from surgery and prayed for her as we've struggled with her issues.

I know that even if Den and I were to not make it as a couple, he would always provide for McKenna. She would be his first priority, as it should be. That thought comforts me. The knowledge that Kenna and Dad have a pretty good relationship makes me very happy. They have some things in common that Mom just doesn't get (or doesn't want to!)...like Phineas & Ferb. Yea, great...glad you guys enjoy it.

Dennis is her protector...the other half of the Parental Guiding Unit. She has such a bond with him that has been forged and shaped as if making a sword of strength. They will sustain this bond for life!

Dennis and I decided to change our entire lives when Kenna was three. Dennis was always on the road, traveling for work and we spent many nights saying "night night" on the phone.....way too many really. Dennis was tired of missing all the big milestones in her life, so we sat down and decided to sell everything we owned and move to Arizona to start over. Den came down first and began looking for a job which would keep him home and at home each and every night. He made sacrifices.

Dennis is a Father. Dennis is a Daddy. Dennis is there for our daughter on a continual basis. She is blessed because of this. She will probably have better relationships with men than girls from broken homes, and she will always have special times with Dad.

My niece Chelsie is graduating from ASU's Honor College this week. She will be a part of three different graduations, one for Honors, one for the entire class of ASU students and one for her college of Criminal Justice. She is also receiving a special award for those students who have had perfect gpa's for each semester they've attended. Pretty special right?

Her Mom is going to be at every graduation...and the open house. Her mom is going to be standing proud and smiling at the shining accomplishments of HER daughter. Chelsie's Father will be there as well....only it won't be her biological father...it will be my Dad. Her Grand Father. Her Bumpa. The special man in her life.

Bumpa deserves the position. He has guided and worried over her, he's "had her back" throughout her entire existence. He has provided monetarily, spiritually and physically for her. He has always offered her advice, help and been proud of her accomplishments.

This blog is entitled How to be a Father. For some men this is an easy formula. There is one basic rule for being a Father....and that is to BE THERE FOR YOUR KIDS. Be there. Whether you have to drive across town or drive/fly across the nation. You have to BE THERE and put in the time..........or you are just a sperm donor.

The Father is the one who laughed and cried and worried and carried and sat with and read stories to and put to bed and drove home from school and taught to drive and......................is THERE. NO MATTER WHAT!

If you aren't being there for your kids, what does that say about you? Is there something more important in your life?

Voluptuous not consumable on prime time? Fox and ABC say NO!

I'm a very curvy woman. I shop at stores which cater to women with lots of curves. I eat, dammit! Okay, I'm eating less these days but even when I am the size I want to get to: I'll still be considered a Plus Sized Woman.

My husband actually told me about this story and I can't believe I hadn't heard about it yet. Apparently, ABC and Fox decided that a Lane Bryant ad was too risque for them to air. Why? You ask? Because they DARED put women in their bras and panties on the commercial. Now, doesn't this happen often with Victoria's Secret? Ah, never! Do they show lots of Little bras and teenie little panties during their annual fashion show? You betcha!

What is the difference? You tell me.....because I'm really sick of being a second class citizen. What gives anyone the right to say that the beautiful model from the Lane Bryant ad is any less of a person of beauty than the women modeling for Vicky's?

Discrimination is running rampant in many parts of the country right now based on Ethnicity but nobody ever talks about the discrimination that fat people go through every day of their lives. In fact, except for in very few places, it's quite legal to discriminate based on weight. Yup. Legal.

I will NOT fly Southwest Airlines due to their "buy two seats" mentality. Is it fair? If I buy three seats for myself, my daughter and my husband, even though we fit across the three seats well, they say my daughter is entitled to her own whole seat...and they would make both myself and my husband buy second seats. Your money may be refunded if the plane isn't full............right.

My problem with this is that it IS an unfair regulation. Does a person who is six feet, five inches and knocks the back of my seat the whole flight have to buy the seat in front of him? No. I've never heard of that happening. Does the person who talks to you annoyingly during the entire flight have to buy the seat next to them so you don't have to listen to their inane chatter? Nope. Never heard of that. Does the screaming baby get a second or third seat to accommodate all the screaming. HA! They don't usually even have to have a ticket for that child.

So, why does the fat person get the discrimination? Because our society lets them get away with it. Society allows fat people to be ridiculed by comedians, discriminated against by employers, and basically left to fend for ourselves.

I'm here, I'm fat. Get used to it!

It's a Sunday kind of thing....

Looks like Sunday is my day to post! I'll try to get better about going so long between posts. This past week has been full of ups and downs for me. Mentally, physically and every other -ly! I went to my yearly women's physical a while ago and had what my Doc called a "funky" in office little EKG. So she made me wear a Holter monitor for 24 hrs. It wasn't as bad as I thought it would be but I guess it has kind of scared me to think there's something up with my heart. Sometimes I over think things and sometimes I just don't think about things that are really bothering me so I think I've been doing a little of both on this subject!

This same week, McKenna had her 24 hr. EEG monitor. Hers was MUCH more intrusive and bulky so we basically came home with her get up on and hung out together the whole time. She did really well and I was so proud! We rewarded ourselves (though I am trying super hard never to reward with food ;) by going to Joe's Farm Grill in Gilbert. It is a heavenly place near her Docs and has been on Diners, Drive Ins and Dives. Worth the trip to anyone near Phoenix! Their food is very organic, they have their own Agritopia Farm for all the produce and they purchase free range chicken and really awesome grass fed beef. It's still a burger joint, but with a twist!

I have fallen for their Grilled Chicken with...oh, I'm gonna go steal their description. BRB.

"Pesto Chicken Sandwich" Fresh thyme-marinated Chicken, Swiss, roasted red bell pepper, grilled mushrooms, farm-made Pecan Pesto. Now their site says Swiss...but it is actually Fontina and it is huge and heavenly! Their fries are made fresh as well. Oh, just go look at their page and then plan to visit! I may start reviewing lovely dining places around here as well!
www.joesfarmgrill.com

So I've been slowly trying to eat healthier and lose some weight. I have to get better about exercise though. The Wii is good but I will be honest and say I don't get it going enough. I've got a goal and I'll let you know if I EVER make it! I count dress size instead of weight. Easier for me. I've gone down four sizes since last year. I want to lose slowly so that is good I think. I've done it just by changing eating patterns.

I will probably lose faster now that I gave up my addiction to Pepsi! Pepsi is my crack and I mean that! I was addicted to soft drinks...but I have been soda pop/carbonation free since I returned from California. Let's see...that's 42 days "sober"! I plan to stay that way.

I won't even address my philosophical opinions on the week at this point. I just got my baby back from Nana and need to snuggle.....more later. Maybe!

So I think I know where this blog is a-goin'!

Each time a person stands for an ideal, or acts to improve the lot of others, or strikes out against injustice, he or she sends forth a tiny ripple of hope. And crossing each other from a million different centers of energy and daring, those ripples build a current that can sweep down the mightiest walls of oppression and resistance. Few are willing to embrace the disapproval of their fellows, the censure of their colleagues, the wrath of their society. Moral courage is a rarer commodity than bravery in battle or great intelligence. Yet it is the one essential vital quality for those who seek to change a world that yields most painfully to change. [Robert F. Kennedy]

Do you get this quote? Does it resonate within you? I have been struggling for the past few days with a "Friend" on facebook. She de-friended me just as I was going to do the same to her. I went to high school with her and we were never best friends then...and I am beginning to understand why. She apparently thought I was posting something directly because of something she posted (and, ironically, I didn't even know she'd posted it!)

I put a Status message up that I disagreed with a new Group which was made up of a hateful comment wishing death to President Obama. Now, with all the derogatory groups aimed at comparing our President to various animals, etc....I stayed silent. But this one really got me! I was royally PISSED OFF! In the darkest days of Bush/Cheney I never wished them dead! I'm also pretty certain that you're not supposed to make death threats against the President, so WOW...to see it on FacePlace really shocked me. That FB would ALLOW this shocked me more.

Yeah, freedom of speech, bla bla bla.............whatever.

So, I've come to the conclusion that she's a very racist, unhappy person! That alone could only explain the things she posted on MY page. My brother was adopted. He was Greek and African American. I know racism as well as any white person can. I grew up with it. And you know what? I am so fortunate to have had Steve in my life to teach me some things that I needed to know. How strong that made our family! The courage my parents had to adopt a transracial child in 1970!

We didn't live in the South, but in a very small town community in Michigan. Steve WAS the minority, practically! We moved from there when he was about ten. It was time.....we moved to East Lansing and immersed ourselves in the awesomeness which was the Michigan State University area action!

While growing up, I remember a trip to Florida where we traveled through Georgia and on Easter Sunday morning, saw a Cross burning on a lawn of a small church! I remember my Dad putting Steve under a pull out bed in our motorhome and telling him to stay there until he was told to come out. I was scared....very scared because I didn't understand what was going on...I only knew that Dad was serious. The situation was serious. I feared for Stevie. He'd been my brother since he was six weeks old! I was just beginning to understand that life was different for us all.

Our journey was just beginning! I will end this post for now. I need to write about all of this in order to process it. I cannot begin to understand everyone. I do not want to understand a person who believes that I can't take a JOKE which includes being racist. I don't think I EVER want to get a joke like that. God(dess) help us all. I think we're going to need it.

Mysteries and other things

So vacation may be over, but am I ready to give up this blog? I don't think so. I've been thinking about blogging for a while now. I don't want to do just a "deals/coupons" blog, don't want to just ramble on about my life, per se, I guess I want to make a difference somehow. I've had an idea percolating for a while now and I'm just waiting for my daughter's okay to speak of it. So, stay tuned for the outcome! If Kenna ok's it, then I will set up a whole new blog. I don't want our names used and you shall see why if I do it. Mystery IS my middle name!

California is but a memory.....

Finally home and I just can't believe how tired out I am from vacation! I know that sounds really funny but it's true. The drive from Carlsbad took longer than getting to the LA area! AND I had about an hour of uphill/downhill mountainous terrain which is NOT my cup of tea. I had to read my book the whole way. I've always had an issue with depth perception. My doc said it was something to do with my eyes and my ears not communicating with my brain! But it really messes with me when it comes to heights and other stuff.

So, to continue on with yesterday's stuff.....

Den, Kenna and I exploring the city areas of Oceanside and Carlsbad looking for lunch options. We ended up eating at Island Burgers because I was craving their Chicken sandwich. Remember: still burgered out! I love the Island Burgers Chicken. I know, "but they are burgers!" But they do a Grilled Chicken sandwich sooooooooo good. Add to that it's only $7.95 for the huge Chicken sandwich, fries and a drink is a deal. Moist, yummy marinated Chicken on whole wheat with onion straws, avacado and mayo. Delish! Iced Tea and it's perfection!!!

So then we meandered down the beach and ended up curiously close to where Mom and Dad were lunching with Nikaya Kipp, who is from Nashville and a former student of Mom's, I used to babysit her and her Dad was a teacher with Mom....ya know, we know her! We found their lunching place and caught up with her.

Then we went to a store near her office (massage therapist and I wish I'd had an appointment!) which reminded me so much of the "old days" of going to wholesale shows. It was booth after booth of ridiculously overpriced stuff which was really pretty and cutesy but I know how much it wholesales for, ya know? We did get a cool present for Barb (Den's Mom). They had the cutest butterfly mobile....and she loves butterflies.

Anyway, that whole area of Solano Beach is so awesome! It's a Design area full of really expensive furniture. Loved it. Couldn't afford it but loved it! Then we all split up again and Den, Kenna and I went back for one last beach adventure. McKenna needed to get her bottle filled up with California Sand!

Later, we all went back to Sammy's Woodfire Pizza (Hey, Sammy, come to Phoenix!) I got the same Chicken, Hummus and Kalamata Olive on Lovash sandwich....why mess with Heaven! Mom and Dad got the Lobster Bisque and that's what I'm having next time. There WILL be a next time! YUM!

Got Dad's pics downloaded to my computer too so enjoy the pics as well. I loved, loved, loved this trip. It was really great to do the trip with my Mom and Dad. We are so lucky to enjoy each other so much! Kenna really needed the break, as did I! I think Den is much happier too! I didn't say Good bye so much as: TTFN California. In the words of your Governor: "I'll be back!"